If you’re a parent, you are no stranger to criticism. In fact, you’ll hear lots of conflicting opinions and judgments about your parenting style, even from complete strangers. Well, someone on Reddit asked, “What is the oddest thing you’ve been parent-shamed over?” Here are some of their stories.
1.
“I was accused of not putting sunblock on my children because they were naturally tan (they get it from their dad). Their skin browns beautifully in the sun. I always put on and reapplied the highest SPF I could find. And I was shamed by a doctor, no less!”
2.
“Going on weekend trips with my friends and no kids. I got comments from both my mom and my mother-in-law: A lot of passive-aggressive ‘must be nice’ comments. I’m always like, yep, it’s really nice. I wish I did it more often. Lol.”
3.
“I have had family members chime in and shame me about how I handle my son’s dairy allergy. They suggest I give him a little bit of dairy at a time. I’m not doing that because it’s never been suggested by his doctors, and dairy makes him violently ill.”
4.
“Giving my two-year-old food any time she is hungry. She has a digestive disease and gets most of her nutrition from pediatric/prescription shakes. I am thrilled if she eats an entire chicken nugget or wants to share my salad with me because 90% of the time, her tummy hurts and she refuses food. But apparently, I’m a bad mom for not forcing her to only eat GMO-free, vegan, organic, dye-free, natural, fresh food at very specific meal times. Listen, if this kid even wants one bite of a cheeseburger and it’s 2 a.m., I will drive to the nearest open McDonald’s and get her a cheeseburger.”
5.
“Trying to keep my premature son (who was two months premature) away from people who were sick during Covid. My father-in-law implied I was a helicopter parent who cared too much.”
6.
“I got mom shamed because I take mental breaks and time for myself about five times per week to go to the gym after the kids have been put down for the night and are safe at home with their dad. I’ve heard, ‘Moms don’t get breaks! It’s a 24-hour job,’ Well…that’s why you’re miserable, Bertha! 🙄😐”
7.
“A relative told me to stop putting my child on a diet because they’re still young and growing, blah blah blah after they found out I don’t give my child eggs or anything that contains eggs… because they’re allergic to eggs 🥚🥴.”
8.
“Having my daughter wear blue pajamas with a boat on them because it ‘made her look like a boy’ (instead of dressing her only pink, I guess?). Sorry that I made it hard for you to play the ‘Guess what genitals this baby has’ game. It’s obviously very important when interacting with a newborn.”
9.
“My oldest son is circumcised, and my youngest son isn’t. For some reason, my OB was just aghast that I wasn’t circumcising the younger one. ‘He won’t match his brother! You’ll have to explain why!’ They are nine years apart in age. Nine years. To my knowledge, they’ve never compared penises, and I can’t even imagine how it would have come up. And I have no issue explaining why, anyway. Besides, this was an OB, not a pediatrician. I don’t know why she even cared.”
10.
“I was shamed for not piercing my daughter’s ears. When my oldest was a newborn, a client complained about how she looked like a boy and that people would confuse her for a boy until I pierced her ears.”
11.
“Someone shamed me for having my child at 37. He said something along the lines of ‘who wants a kid from a shriveled up 37-year-old egg,’ then went on to tell me I should have had my baby between the ages of 24–27 instead.”
12.
“My toddler (now 16) would get terribly car sick every time we drove anywhere. We were in the parking lot of the grocery store (a ten-minute drive away), my daughter was puking, and some old lady was berating me about what a terrible mother I was. I was ‘so selfish, taking my sick child out, blah, blah, blah.’ I was shocked and speechless, but my best friend yelled back, ‘We would have stayed home, but we were out of cigarettes and beer!’ It was fabulous.”
13.
“Regarding my naturally thin child, I’ve heard, ‘Back in my day, we fed our babies. They were fat and healthy!'”
14.
“My (childless) sister-in-law shamed me for not making separate, more bland meals for my daughter to eat. Obviously, I’m not gonna feed her spicy stuff like jalapeños or stuff she doesn’t like, but apparently, I’m borderline abusing my child by ‘forcing’ her to eat ‘adult’ food…”
15.
“Dual mom household here. On multiple occasions, people have asked who the ‘real’ mom is and gotten freaked out or judgmental when I explain our kid is not biologically either of ours, lol. The shit that comes out of some people’s mouths…some of my all-time favorite comments are: ‘Well, why do you have her then?’ I’m sorry, I didn’t know I owed everyone an origin story for my kid. ‘Are you going to give her back?’ Yeah, I’m just raising her for fun, then gonna return her when the hard stuff is over. ‘Which one of you is like legally her mother?’ Both of us, stupid. Oh, and there’s my all-time favorite: ‘So you took her, and you’re keeping her from her real parents?’ No, that’s called kidnapping, and that’s not what’s happening here.”
16.
“I had an old lady comment to me that my baby must be cold as I walked down the deli aisle of the grocery store. He was in shorts and a tank top, and we didn’t stop for anything; just passed through in about 30 seconds. This was during a heat wave last summer where temps were over 100°.”
17.
“I was shamed because my son had gray nail polish on his toes when he was four. He saw me painting mine and wanted his done.”
18.
“First, it was staying at home, then it was going back to work. Apparently, there is no right answer for moms. We’re all doing it wrong.”
19.
“I was restocking the freezer with frozen lasagna, enchiladas, etc. from the grocery store just in case we need a quick, easy meal, and I put my things on the conveyor belt. An older man (it’s always the older men who say dumb shit) looked at what I was buying and said to my four kids who were with me, ‘It doesn’t look like Mom has time to cook from scratch, does it?’ I should have said, ‘Yeah because I’m too busy minding my own business,’ but I just said, ‘It just matters that everyone is fed.’ I’m at a season of life when I can’t cook from scratch every day. My kids are one, three, five, and seven.”
20.
“For breastfeeding my kids past a year of age and not bottle feeding (they hated bottles, wouldn’t take them). Had a cashier at Walmart tell me I was abusing my daughter because she was crying in line, and I said she was hungry, and I had to feed her. She told me I should be ashamed that I didn’t have a bottle of formula on me.”
22.
“Sending your kids to daycare may get you shamed, but not putting my child in daycare also got me shamed. I was told I was ‘stunting his growth’ by being a stay-at-home parent to my son. 🤷🏻♀️”
23.
“Because my kids help around the house with chores (they’re four, six, and ten), and I’m not talking about hard chores, more like please make your bed, clean your toys up, set the table, wipe the table, water the plants, pick up shoes, etc… It’s all divided, and they all enjoy doing it! But no, I have to hear from in-laws about how I’m torturing and slaving my children around! 🤦🏼♀️”
What is something you have been parent-shamed for or something you’ve overheard another parent being criticized for? Tell us in the comments or in this anonymous form.
